The idea that Tiv men offer their wives to their visitors to pass the night with is a total myth and baseless. There has never been an iota of truth about that mythical idea and there never will be.
In fact, I thought we had laid this matter to rest long ago, until I heard one of your Nigerian celebrities speak so confidently about it – in the affirmative – on television recently.
I decided to “sensitize” you, if you’ve heard and believed this nonsense before; and you also who may not have heard of it before, but you’re capable of believing whatever your celebrities or other people say, even if they tell you that humans live in the sun.
Do Tiv Men Offer their Wives to their Visitors?
Well, the short answer is NO.
Have you ever seen how male animals behave when other males try to come around their “ladies?” They guard their territories, chasing off intruders. I’m talking of cocks, he-goats, dogs and other animals whose brains function in way lesser capacities than human brains.
If there’s anything you are likely not to miss when you come in contact with Tiv people of Benue state, it is the fact that by virtue of their physical and spiritual makeup, they are warriors. This fact is even manifest in the way they converse and do things.
The major function of a warrior is to guard his territory. The home is a man’s primary territory. His wife is the principal object of his protection, in the course of guarding that territory – especially with jealousy.
I do not know how or why a human being should fall for the ridiculous lie that such a man, or any sane man for that matter, will foolishly offer his wife to service visitors. In fact, on what basis will a wife agree to render such services in the first place?
With regards to this line of thought, it is a positive thing that pride is a huge part of the default settings of Tiv men and women.
So, how come about the misguided lie that Tiv men do offer their wives as “kolanut” to their visitors? I think that fallacy was born out of the fact that a typical Tiv man by nature is generous, warm, accommodating and very hospitable.
It is not as though they would literally give their wives to visitors to sleep with. A Tiv man will never do that. The Tiv people are generally happy and fun-loving people, and would do anything to make their visitors feel at home.
But that doesn’t mean they will hand their wives to you when you come visiting. Absolutely wrong!
Tiv people are battle ready warriors who would do anything to protect their territory – their wives being their main priority.
Maybe you’ve never heard of this. They did not tell you how Tiv warriors terminated the Dan Fodio Jihad movement at Ushongo Hills.
They decided to fabricate this very poor idea. I am not as concerned about the fabricators and their idea, as I am concerned about the fact that people can actually believe and propagate this kind of idea.
Come to think of it, assuming there is a man on earth who can willingly offer his wife to a visitor (and such a wife can willingly agree to be offered), can such anomalous behavior be the culture of an entire tribe or society?
Think about that for a second!
In this era of unrestrained access to information, we need to deliberately put on our rational thinking caps whenever we come across any information.
If these few points have not removed the rod in your eyes to see the uncanny falsehood and senselessness inherent in the notion that a Tiv man can offer you his wife for the night when you visit him, then it is pathetic that no mortal endeavor can successfully “sensitize” you.
Maybe you should travel to Benue to visit a Tiv man. If it gets dark and you perceive he’s wasting your time, quickly demand for your visitors’ reward. Thereafter, kindly receive in good fate the offer he makes.
I hope to see you in Benue soon.